December 17, 2003 - 9:19 a.m.

Overwhelmed

No, it's not really all that bad, but I am already feeling the strain of this crazy week. B is out of school for the holidays now, so on top of long, late nights of rehearsals, I get long days of entertaining a preschooler and trying to be loving and patient on not enough sleep. That's why he's watching a movie right now. I hardly ever let the kids watch movies, and they haven't even had their usual half hour of PBS before dinner very often lately. As far as I am concerned, I am not paid to plunk them down in front of the television. However, this week, if a video can buy me 90 minutes to catch up on email, address a few more Christmas cards, or even just a little rest I will not begrudge myself that. Plus, it's a bit of a bribe, since I have to drag B out so I can do a couple of errands today. I have to get my last package out in the mail and pick up some white tights and a curling iron for the play. I get to put my recently shortened hair into ringlets. Yippee! I bet I am going to look like Shirley Temple. I'm not sure when I am going to find time to do the ringleting, since the girls have gymnastics until 5:30, their mom will be home around 6, and I have to be at the theater at 6:15... I really don't want to have to curl my hair before taking the girls to gymnastics. I am not the most vain of people, but walking around in the 21st century with an early 20th century coiffure would be a bit embarrassing. I guess I could be a walking advertisement, which would be great if I were able to be proud of the show. At this point, though, I am not proud.

The show is getting better, which has kept me from utter despair and also has kept my furious rantings from being unleashed on unsuspecting cast members who think I am sweet and quiet. I simply cannot understand why people still don't know their lines! The show opens the day after tomorrow!!!!! Tonight we finally get to rehearse on the stage with the set and our costumes. Optimistic, as always, I am hoping that finally being in the proper setting for the show will help everyone stay focused and get into character. We also get to work with the orchestra. I am actually looking forward to seeing the costumes and set and getting a feel for what this production will really be like. Two nights, though, isn't a lot of time to work out the kinks in logistics, microphones, lights, costumes, etc - especially when we're still trying to polish music, lines, and choreography.

I am sure you are all sick of hearing me complain about the show, but this has been my outlet for all the frustration. Once the show opens on Friday I'll be able to let go. It'll never be a mind-blowing production, but we may pull of an entertaining evening. If not, I'll be a tad embarrassed when people I know are in the audience, but I am sure I will mostly enjoy singing and dancing and being responsible for pulling my weight even if other folks don't pull theirs.

In other news, the placemats I am having the kids make for their parents for Christmas are turning out really well. They are just woven ribbons with a backing of fabric. The girls have enjoyed the process, but B has had to be cajoled each time we've worked on them. He's still self-centered enought that he doesn't really care about making special things for his parents unless there's something in it for him. So, I've been having him do a little at a time. The weaving that the kids are doing has been easy for them, but the assembly process is turning out to be more of a challenge for me. It's not precisely difficult, but it is time-consuming. I've already spent around $7 per placemat on materials, and I estimate that by them time they are complete, I'll have spent almost an hour on each one as well. That's why I decided that the finished product will be a gift from me as well as the kids. I got the parents a couple of Christmas ornaments, as well, but since I have invested a good bit of time and money into this project, I don't feel the need to give them a separate real gift of my own.

Enough rambling out of me. Time to go finish those Christmas cards, or fold laundry, or any of the other things on my to do list while B is still occupied. :)

today's project: staying awake and preferably patient

musing about: taking B to the indoor playground

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