April 03, 2003 - 2:08 p.m.

Here Goes Nothing

This week's weather has pretty much been the antithesis of last week's. Instead of sunny and warm with hardly a cloud in the sky, we've had a gloomy, messy mix of rain and snow and chilly winds. Tomorrow in Charlottesville is supposed to be sunny and in the 70s. That will be a nice change.

As the time to leave approaches, I am getting even more nervous. My stomach is doing flip-flops. I think part of my anxiety over the visit is based on a subconscious fear that all this is too good to be true. It's rare that one gets a second chance like this, and a part of my is afraid that after four months apart (and some serious anger and bitterness at least on my part during that time) things may have changed too much between us for us to be entirely comfortable or happy together again. Deep down I know that if we are as well-suited to one another as I have always thought we are, everything will work itself out eventually and our relationship will be even stronger. He'll have worked out his doubts and I will have assured him that my life went on in his absence and that I am not and will not live entirely for him. Still, I worry a bit that we'll mess this up. It's hard enough, as I have said before, maintaining a long distance relationship. Rebuilding one may be a huge challenge.

I may or may not update here over the weekend. Sam doesn't have internet access at home, so I'd only post if I go in to the law school with him at some point. I am sure I will have plenty to say on Monday, though.

today's project: I think activity books is the best project I can muster today

musing about: whether I forgot to pack anything

�

flutter back - fly ahead