March 31, 2003 - 4:04 p.m.

Dare I Hope?!?!?!?

I'd been putting this new off for fear of jinxing things, but I think it may be safe now. B has been pooping in the toilet regularly for well over a week, and has not had an accident in 8 days! Hooray! True to the nature of the entire struggle, there didn't seem to be any particular thing that triggered his success. He must have just made up his mind to do it... AT LAST! He does seem pleased with being able to have hot chocolate milk again, though. We have lavished praise upon him for being such a big boy, and his mom is following through with her promise to enroll him in taekwondo (about which he is extremely excited!). Yet another joy to add to my list this spring!

The work on the kitchen is pretty much done - granite counters, new sink, and new knobs and drawer pulls in, walls and new wainscotting painted, etc. The new window by the kitchen table really brightens up the room. I wasn't sure I was going to like the yellow walls and hunter green beadboard with the new counters (a pretty, speckly granite with shades of brown and black) but I think I like it now. The backsplash isn't installed yet, but the kitchen is livable again, and the workers are out of my hair! R, the kids' dad, is already planning a new patio outside, now. It seems once you get the man started planning projects, he just can't stop! I wonder when S will pull the purse strings closed on him! :)

My visit with Sam is rapidly approaching but not rapidly enough. I don't know how to feel about it. I am eager to see him and catch up and see what's changed in him that brought about this new beginning. But I am also nervous. I am afraid that this first visit will be very awkward, that we will have lost the knack of being comfortable together. I also cannot predict even my own response to being back in the same room with him. I know it will be nice to hug him and see him smile, but beyond that I just don't know... I might smile, I might cry, I might kiss him, I might feel aloof. Right now I basically want to get it over with!

Meanwhile, it snowed last night and into this morning. Ick. We only got a dusting and it has already melted, but they are forecasting a bit more tomorrow night before it warms up again. I can't really complain, though, since we had a sold week of perfect weather last week. This is New England, after all. :)

today's project: piano lessons and art projects

musing about: how best to greet a boyfriend-no-longer-in-absentia

YYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

MMMMMMMMMMMMMMOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNKKKKKKKEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!

�

flutter back - fly ahead