April 30, 2004 - 7:16 a.m.

Oops, He Did It Again

Sam dumped me. Yep, again. You know the old saying? Well, I can hear the fat lady warming up right now.

Basically, it's the same old things as last time. He's just not sure, and while I would certainly prefer to be in a relationship with someone who is a little less wishy washy, that seems like a pretty ridiculous reason to end more than three and a half years of laughter, smiles, support... But it takes two to tango, as they say, and I am back to being a wallflower.

Even if I do find somebody as great as Sam, without the new and improved Sudden Dumping Action, of course, I am going to have more baggage than Immelda Marcos on a year-long world tour after this. This seems to be a pattern in my life. Find a great guy, settle into happy relationship, suddenly get dumped on my ass for little or no reason - certainly nothing having to do with me, or so they say. So, if I have a next relationship, it's basically doomed. I'll be constantly looking over my shoulder waiting for the Looney Tunes anvil to fall on my head and smash me flat like a pancake, which is becoming a familiar feeling.

On the bright side:

1. I've lost my appetite. Maybe I'll finally lose some weight.

2. I don't need to worry about finding work in Charlottesville anymore.

3. My puffy, red eyes force me to wear my spiffy new glasses.

4. I get to keep the frequent flyer miles I racked up visiting Sam.

5. No more wondering whether he's The One. Now he's The One That Got/Ran Away.

6. There is no number six.

7. No more standing in line at the post office to mail him care packages.

I need to get out of the house and find four walls and a bed that don't remind me of him. Even my toile pillows are mocking me with their smiling, wooing couples. Ugh.