August 20, 2003 - 8:15 p.m.

Worcester!

I promised you the tale of the bachelorette party, and oh what a tale it is! Though perhaps in the retelling I will discover that you sort of had to be there....

The basic plan for the party, other than getting drunk and making fools of ourselves and a spectacle of the bride to be, was to do some barhopping with a sort of scavenger hunt element. So we gathered at one of the bridesmaids apartments, donned feather boas and pipecleaner tiaras - the bachelorette wore a hot pink veil as well - and hit the town.

The bridesmaids had come up with clues to be delivered in each of the bars we visited that should lead the bride to a person in the bar who would then give her one of her gifts. She had to at various establishments approach a bouncer, a DJ, a bartender, etc. There were some logistical errors, but she seemed to enjoy the game, and it gave the night some cohesiveness, not to mention helping all of us later remember what happened and where, since we could, once the intoxication wore off, match events with bars via which clue was given or what prize recieved.

While the bride-to-be was hunting down the strangers referred to in the clues, the rest of us kept ourselves occupied by issuing "challenges" to one another. A better word would be "dares". I was the lucky recipient of the first dare, which was to get a guy to buy me a blow job shot. I think they thought I would try to weasel my way out of it or blush the entire time. Au contraire! Very soon after the challenge was issued, I located my prey. He and a friend had joined our group's conversation, and I took the opportunity to tell him that if he wanted to hang out with us, he would have to buy me a drink. With help from his highly amused friend, I conquered his reluctance and passivity and succeeded in the challenge. I had to order the shots, since he was cowering behind the taps where the bartender couldn't see him and was being ridiculously passive! Still, he paid, and I was off the hook. Embarassingly enough, I was not nearly as adept in downing the shot as I had been in acquiring it. About a quarter of it ended up in my hair and down my shirt. Luckily, I had the electric blue feather boa to drape over the stain it left. :)

Other challenges over the course of the evening included asking a guy if he knew what a THACO is (you would only know this is, like many of the girls in attendance, you tried your hand at Dungeons and Dragons in your teens) and seeing which of two of the bridesmaids could collect the most phone numbers from guys. I am not sure whether I got too drunk to remember any other challenges or if we all got too drunk to present them later in the evening. In one bar we loudly cheered on the Red Sox on TV. In another, two of us did a very shoddy interpretation of a jig while another approached a guy only to refocus her attention when she noticed his friend was much cuter. And in yet another, we did the limbo with the boas in place of a broom. And no matter where we went, if anyone asked where the bride would be going on her honeymoon, we shouted, "Worcester!" She also collected business cards from tons of people with marriage advice and messages written on the back. They ran the gamut from good luck to "Please, have sex with me!"

Over the course of the night, probably about 4 hours or so, my alcohol consumption consisted of three ciders (one of which was bought for me by a married man who claimed he would be dreaming of me naked at 4AM - needless to say this was revealed after he bought me the drink!), the blow job shot, a tequila shot, a sex on the beach, and some of a communal scorpion bowl. The last cider I drank really quickly, since we were about to go home, and I think it was my downfall.

I returned with the bridesmaid who hosted the party to her apartment, since my car was parked on her street. I was in no shape to drive home, so she let me crash on her floor. We were sitting and talking for a while when suddenly I felt kind of nauseous and proceeded to get sick into her kitchen sink. That was the first time I have ever been sick from drinking, believe it or not. She was really nice about the whole thing, thankfully, but I was still really embarrassed. Amazingly enough, when I woke up Saturday morning, I was not the least bit hungover. Which was good, since I had to drive home, pack for the overnight in NH, pick up Sam, and drive three hours to NH all before 1PM.

It was quite an adventure, and I thoroughly enjoyed myself, but I think it will be a while before I go barhopping again!

today's project: taught the kids how to make balloon dogs

musing about: what to do with my relatively unscheduled weekend

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